Category Archives: auditions

While tweeting on Twitter today (yes, you can find me on Twitter at http://twitter.com/ninaamir), I saw a link offered as the answer to a question about the difference between a regular resume and a dance resume. So, of course, I clicked on the link. I discovered a short and sweet explanation of what goes into a dance resume. The piece is really meant for kids applying to college dance programs, but I think the information is relevant to all dancers–and your boys likely will need a resume at some point. I know Julian has been asked to have a resume on many occasions already.

Anyway, here’s the link to the article:  http://danceu101.com/content/how-do-i-create-dance-résumé. I hope you find it useful. It comes from danceu101.com, a site put together by the editors of Dance Spirit, Dance, Pointe, and Dance Teacher magazines.

Last, but definitely not least, here’s part four to my interview with Duncan Cooper. If you don’t remember who Duncan is, please go back to this post to read the brief bio I offered in the part one.

Working on Flexibility and Weaknesses

Continuing my conversation with Duncan,  I wanted to know if he often saw the kind of flexibility issues with which my son, Julian, struggles. He has tightness in the hips, and can’t get his splits. Of course, he has grown about eight inches since last July, which means his muscles have not caught up to his bones, but he has never been very flexible.

Here’s what Duncan had to say: “Some boys are just naturally flexible…You have to do a lot of stretching. When I was his age [14], I warmed up for 30 minutes to an hour before class in the studio before the class began stretching. After class I would stretched to cool down.

“In dance, if you don’t use it, you’ll lose it. And if you don’t use it, you’ll never get it,” he concluded.

In general young male dancers need to know both their strengths and weaknesses and to realize, more often than not, they are presenting their strengths, he added. “But you need to work on your weaknesses. Often a weakness for some boys is flexibility. Some are very flexible. Some are good turners. Some are good jumpers, but they might not have the other two qualities.  To be well rounded in all is better than to be just good at one.” 

In other words, boys must not just focus doing the things that come naturally to them but on the things that don’t. They must practice these weak points until they become strengths.

The Male Mind or Psychological Issues that Affect Boys

When I asked Duncan if he thought boys had any unique psychological issues, he laughed and said, “Yes. Sometimes we joke around that men have shorter attention spans in class than women. Maybe it’s based on a kind of ADD male testosterone issue where they get so much testosterone that sporadically they are all over the place,” he commented. “The tendency is for them to have focusing issues, especially when they are together in groups.”

He went on to add, “Men are often more challenge than women, because they start dancing later then women do.” While they might find it easier to find jobs, because there are so few male dancers, they are often struggling to catch up with their female counterparts, who likely have been dancing longer.

While this engenders a desire to move fast, “going fast” tends to be a “guy thing” in general. I mentioned Julian’s desire to move up the levels at Ballet San Jose School more quickly than he was allowed, and the ballet mistress there, Lise LaCour, not allowing him to do so. Duncan responded that this attitude was not uncommon for boys, and he cautioned, “It’s not about going to the next or another level. It’s not about going through eight levels and you get a new Karate belt. It doesn’t work that way. It’s not about getting a trophy. It’s about becoming an artist.”

Likening this process to wine, he said, “You can’t rush good wine. Wine is going to develop on its own time. It’s the same with an artist.”

Men have to learn more than just how to dance well, and this takes time, too. They have to learn to be good soloists and, as mentioned in previous posts, they have to dance with emotion and be “matinee idols,” which means being great actors. Additionally, they have to possess the ability to be a lead dancer, which means carrying a production, such as a Broadway show, a contemporary piece or a full-length ballet. “For that you have to be a good dancer and a good partner,” said Duncan. “Men are notoriously bad partners.”

That comment led to a logical question: How does a young man become a good partner? “Good male dancers will listen to what their partners need. Each woman needs something different. They’ll also know the women’s choreography. If you know the woman’s part in partnering, you know when to pick her up and when to put her down.  Often guys rush through that. That’s part of the skill of learning not to rush,” Duncan explained.

Making Convention Choreography Your Own – or Not

On a different note altogether, I asked Duncan, who is on the faculty of New York City Dance Alliance, what he wants from convention attendees when he gives them choreography. When he gives the boys, for instance, a special piece of choreography, what gets a child chosen to be on stage?  Does he want them to make that choreography “their own” or to perform it exactly as he has shown them to dance it? Here’s what he said:

“I’m looking for individuality. I’m looking for them to show me something different in the movement that I haven’t seen in all the other kids. Just because you are going up on stage doesn’t mean squat. It might mean I saw you do something well, but I’m not always looking for the kid that does something perfect as a ballet dancer. Sometimes I’m looking for the kid who is learning the most, who is challenging themselves the most, and that isn’t always the person who knows ballet technique the best. I want to see someone who is stretching their learning curve, and that doesn’t always come from the person who can do perfect ballet technique.

“I bring people on stage that has different skills. One might be able to turn, one might have a great leap, one might be able to do the move and phrasing in a unique way. Each dancer has something special, but it’s not just about who gets up on stage, and that’s what I want them to see.”

Duncan stressed that while being in a room full of great dancers and working with new and inspiring teachers represents the upside to conventions, the downside consists of the plastic trophies and the competition to get chosen to be on stage. “That’s not ultimately what it’s about. Your trophy isn’t going to do you any good when you go to an audition. They’re not going to say, ‘Oh, you were the gold winner at New York City Dance Alliance.’ They don’t know who you are when you are at an audition for a Broadway show,” he said. Thus, young dancers – male or female – need to learn to interpret what goes on at a convention in a different manner, to see it in a different way, and to not let any part of the convention discourage them.

As for making the choreography your own, if the instructor says to do so, go for it! “If I say to make the choreography your own, you self-discover yourself,” Duncan stated. “Show me what makes you unique within the choreography. Don’t be afraid to step up and fail. Screw the choreography up. Sometimes you have to do that to get it. Stop trying to be perfect and please the teacher. Sometimes you try to please the choreographer or teacher so hard that you actually do a disservice to yourself. You are pleasing yourself. You need to be in the moment and work with that.”

Duncan described how the director at San Francisco Ballet would offer him tips when he was working on a turn, and the turn would get worse rather than better. “I was thinking he had the ultimate answer and not relying on what I know I feel when I do the turn. He wasn’t in my body. He didn’t ultimately know where my balance is. He could give me some clues to get there. That’s why I tell kids, ‘I’m not trying to get you to bake a new cake; I’m just adding some frosting to it.’ So don’t screw up what makes you great. Don’t lose your self identity as a dancer.”

Advice for Young Male Dancers Who Find the Road a Tough One to Hoe

For all those young male dancers out there, like my son, who constantly are faced with tough choices – sports or dance, conforming or being different, summer dance intensive or summer camp, fight or walk away when teased, Duncan had some words of wisdom to offer.

“That’s life. It’s hard. They’re feeling like, ‘I’m different than all the other kids.’ Often they are all taught to wear the same clothes – what’s trendy and cool. The down side to that is that the most beautiful thing is your uniqueness as an individual and as an artist. That’s a great thing. Do what you want to do. You don’t have to follow what rest of flock is doing. Be a male ballet dancer. Who cares what those other guys think? Do what you love; that’s a good thing. Don’t conform and confine, obviously within the constraints of what is good for you. If you want something in life, put yourself out there and go get it. I wish I had heard that more as a kid. But it’s not easy.

Duncan has faced some difficult issues and decisions as a male dancer as well. “I found having three knee surgeries by 21 years old hard. I thought I was the be all and end all, and I thought I’d be dancing for the rest of my life, and all of a sudden it was being taken away from me…That was very humbling,” he confided.

Additionally, he said, “It was difficult for me, because I was an African American dancer. As I got older I began to see that the image of a ballet dancer was European…This goes back to ‘I don’t look like everyone else,’ so now I’m not going to get the part. No, you don’t’ look like everybody else, because you’re unique. Or maybe that’s when I was a kid and I got beat up in school because I danced ballet. How does one deal with that? I ran to school every day. You can roll up in a ball and cry or you can get over it and move on.”

The fact that life is hard – maybe harder for male dancers (even though the girls tend to think it’s easier for the boys) – actually can become an asset. “If anything is easy in life then you probably won’t be the best at it, and you probably won’t know how to deal with things when things get tough. That’s big lesson to learn,” said Duncan.

‘Everybody is going to have their own set of challenges,” he says. When my son – or yours – finds himself in a room filled with kids who are all better dancer, without mom or dad to help him anymore, denied all the roles he thought he would – or should – be given, Duncan concludes, “That’s when he’ll find out what he’s made of.” That’s when knowing how to deal with life being hard (and not rushing) will come in handy.

My fellow blogger, or Nichelle  Strzepek, has posted a superb response to my post, and the ensuing comments, about when and how to make choreography your own. It’s well worth a read. You can find it here: http://danceadvantage.net/2009/04/16/make-it-your-own/

You also might want to go check out her website, Dance Advantage. It’s a great resource. Dance Advantage is an online resource for and about dance students, teachers, studio owners, and parents. New articles that relate to the education of dancers, primarily focusing on the study of and training in concert dance forms like ballet, jazz, and contemporary, are added all the time. Nichelle writes about dance as a way to share her thoughts and passion for dance art and education. Dance Advantage strives to provide high quality information that will supplement students’ in-class learning and experiences as well as inspire and support teachers in their work.

By the way, there are two dance registries out there…both run by guys…you might also want to check out.  By this I mean social networking for dancers! One is called Dance Register, and it is run by Julian’s old tap instructor, former Tap Dog Anthony LoCascio. He also has a blog. Then there is Dance Stage, run by a nice young dance student who performs in a pre-professional company in Oregon (and hopes to move to LA soon to dance). And of course, Dance Advantage has a number of great networking opportunities through its Dance Advantage Interactive site.

So, get your boys off of FaceBook and MySpace and onto some dance-related social networking sites. You might try them out yourselves -especially those at Dance Advantage. You’ll find some amazing information there!

I was reading a post at BoysBallet.wordpress.com, called Being Billy Elliot that is from a story written by Nancy Stetson for the Florida Weekly that talks,  about ballet dancer Stephen Hanna’s role in the Broadway musical Billy Elliot. Hanna plays the grown up “Billy.” The article describes a scene in which Billy is imagining himself as older and the two — the younger “Billy” played by one of  three different dancers each night (Kiril Kulish, David Alvarez, and Trent Kowalik) and Hanna — do a pas de deux.

Reading this reminded me of a really valuable practice used by many athletes that our dancing boys can use to help them in so many ways — with their performances, competitions, technique, and general advancement in the art form. What is this practice? Visualization!

As I’ve said before, I’m a big human potential and personal growth proponent. So, I know or have used a lot of the tricks of this trade. However, visualization is one that has been used so successfully by so many athletes. And it’s so simple. You simply develop a really clear picture of yourself doing whatever it is you want to do successfully. If you want to perform your dance perfectly, you see yourself doing so. Or you imagine yourself in the spotlight taking your bow with all the people clapping and yourself feeling like you danced the best you’ve ever danced. If you want more flexibility in your hips (since this is an area in which boys’ bodies often are tight), you can visualize — or imagine — your hips being very flexible and allowing easy movement or the muscles stretching easily as you move and stretch. You can see the muscles like rubber bands or taffy… You get the idea.

I don’t know why I didn’t think of this technique before, but reading that article and seeing the picture of the older and younger Billy made me suddenly realize how easy it would be for boys (or girls) to visualize themselves achieving their dance goals as a way of helping themselves actually do so. This is not enough, obviously. They have to train and strengthen their bodies, but will help. It’s another tool in their toolbox.

If you don’t believe this works, ask some professional athletes. Or listen to some motivational tapes from Brian Tracy or any number of human potential and personal growth teachers in a variety of arenas (business, sports, spirituality). Or take my word for it. I did a fire walk once, and all we did for two hours prior to putting our feet on those glowing coals was visualize being on the other side with our feet in buckets of cool water. And guess what? I walked across those coals not once but twice without even the slightest burn on my feet.

Anyone can use this technique for anything. You can visualize yourself having a successful job interview or dance audition. You can visualize yourself having a good outcome to a confrontational communication with someone or to a conversation with your teenager about homework or grades.

There’s one caveat to this, however: The visualization is more effective if you can actually feel what it would be like to achieve the outcome you desire. If you can get a sense of being in that lime light with the applause and feeling like you’ve never danced better, if you can really feel the pleasure of muscles that are supple and flexible, if you can feel the relief of a communication gone well and the honest and love that were shared in the process, if you can feel the sense of achievement of landing a new job or being told your got the  part after an audition. The key is to combine your thoughts of what you desire with the feeling of having it. In other words, while you are visualizing what you want, feel it as if it had already happened. It shouldn’t feel like an “I wish” scenario happening in the future but rather like something happening right now in this moment.

I hope Julian and I will be able to go see Billy Elliot while we are in NYC. We are in the process of looking for apartment sublets at this point (if anyone knows of one).

We’re back from The Pulse. Julian is tired, happy to have danced with some great choreographers and to have learned some cool choreography, and a bit disappointed not to have won a scholarship of any sort. I know…I know. The scholarship isn’t important. Tell that to Julian. He had several choreographers talk to him and tell him he was doing a good job, but no real “recognition.” To him that means he isn’t yet good enough.

I attended all of Saturday’s classes and the last class on Sunday. So, while I could only relate what Julian told me after the Nuvo convention, this time I actually analyzed a bit of what was going on when it came to choreography and how the kids interpreted it or “copied” it, and how they were, indeed, getting recognized. And now I can tell you what I think…or what questions came up for me…for whatever that is worth.

First, let me say, that there were some pretty awesome dancers there, especially when it came to the boys. Saturday was almost totally focused on hip hop classes. I thought some of these boys would disappear on Sunday, which seemed mostly focused on contemporary, but when I go there for the last class most of the boys were still in attendance. And most of them were just as good at contemporary as they had been at hip hop. (They did combine the advanced and pro class for that last class that I watched, because they were short one teacher; Mia Michaels was sick and didn’t show. I guess Julian is destined not to dance with her. Instead they had Brian Friedman for a second class.)

So, here’s what I noticed: First, according to Julian and from what I heard while I was in the room, at this convention all the teachers told the attendees to make the dance “their own.” That makes the question from my last post mute. And it gave the kids the freedom to learn the dance and then go beyond the basic movements. Most of the kids, however, did the choreography pretty much as taught. The difference between how one dancer did it and another and who got put on state and who didn’t (and who got scholarships and who didn’t) seemed to me to come down to the amount of energy, feeling, accuracy, and precision in the movements. The kids made it their own not so much through interpretation that changed the choreography in any way but in how much they bent their knees, how much emotion was portrayed in the movement of a head or hand, how quickly their torso moved, etc.

As I watched them move, and as I watched Julian, a question arose in my mind: Is it possible that a boy’s dancing  (or a girl’s) can be inhibited by their developmental stage at any given time? I think the answer is a resounding “yes.” And here’s why.

Let’s take a simple example first. One of the first dances the kids did on Saturday was to a song that was very sexual in nature. It was all about taking a girl home and having her do to the guy what he normally did to her. While the choreography could be done by anyone, the kids who performed it best, did so in a very sexual manner. They had the pelvic thrusts and the sways of the hips and the movements of the hands down the body down to a sexy art. (It’s a bit appalling actually to think that 14 and 15 year olds know how to dance this way…The room was filled with 14-18 year olds.)  More to the point, if a 14 or 15 year old (or 16 or 17 year old) doesn’t have the developmental wherewithal to know how to dance that way — to drum up the feeling to dance that way, they aren’t going to carry off the choreography well. Their performance is going to be missing something that a boy who maybe has had a sexual experience, or whose hormones make him feel sexual or sexy, or who has watched a lot of movies with sex scenes, or who simply is older and can relate to the words of the song will have.  Their movements will belie their knowledge, understanding and depth of feeling, while the other boys movements will be lacking. And I definitely saw some that were lacking in that way…and some that were not.

A less simple example comes when you have a kid whose developmental stage makes him insecure. Take your average freshman in high school, who is trying to fit in, find himself, and discover even a small sense of self-esteem.  The lack of these things will show in their dancing despite any superb technique or ability to mimic choreography or even make it their own. Their performance just won’t be as strong; it will wreak of all those insecurities they carry with them all day long, even if they feel fairly secure on the dance floor. Wherever they carry that insecurity — in their upper bodies, in their arms, in their shoulders — that’s where you’re going to see their dancing falling short and looking weak.

All this to say that the dancers I saw really “hitting it” at the convention seemed to have a maturity about them, a strong sense of self and a confidence that allowed them to carry out the choreography in a way that made you notice them. They were not only really going for it and making sure they got noticed, they were putting their heart and soul into the movements with a true sense of self.

This all became clear to me during the question and answer session. Someone asked what the choreographers looked for when dancers audition for parts in shows. Two choreographers responded. Tyce Diorio said something along these lines: “I look for people who are real individuals.” From this I took him to mean that that sense of individuality and strong sense of self comes through in their dancing.

Laurieann said, “Spirit is like a muscle, and you have to exercise it every day.” As she elaborated on this, what I took away was that as you exercise your spirit, strengthening your ability to bring your spirit forth in your dance (which means bringing more of yourself through your dance), you become a better and more unique dancer.

Both of these pieces of advice require confidence and a strong sense of self. (They don’t require a big ego; in fact, a large ego is usually a symptom of insecurity.) And many young dancers — boys and girls alike — are still trying to find their individuality, struggling against the pressure to conform in order to fit in, and their spirit. Thus, they may not have these qualities yet. They have to find their individuality; they have to know who they are, be okay with themselves, feel good about who they are even if they don’t fit in, even if they are different. They have to like — love — themselves. And then they have to dance in a way that expresses who they are.

I think Julian’s stuck in a developmental stage right now that isn’t helping his dancing. I suggested he go into the studio alone with his music and “find himself.” Actually, during the question and answer session someone asked if dance class or time spent dancing alone benefited a dancer’s education more.  I believe Wade Robson said, “Both are beneficial.” Julian doesn’t spend much time dancing alone.

Now, I’m not sure that dancing alone will help Julian find himself in school or socially, but it’s a start. One area at a time.

And for every boy that is still struggling to find himself, I wonder if the same advice doesn’t apply: Be an individual. Exercise your spirit muscle.  Go into the studio alone and find yourself.

Today I have to admit that I was called to the carpet by a reader, a young man who feels I’ve written about him, and rightly so. I didn’t name him, but I guess he felt “described” well enough for someone to notice. And he also pointed out that I had made a few judgements that might have been uncalled for and inappropriate.

Well…it’s my blog, after all. I can say what I want here, but, as a mom, I don’t want to hurt the feelings of any young male dancers. That, of course, is not my mission. My mission has been to address the issues faced by young male dancers and their parents.

I guess I’ve not really gotten it through my thick head that people are actually reading this blog! When I started, there were so few readers, and now I have a steady following. I now must be more conscious of the fact that when I write about people, they might actually show up here one day…or someone they know might do so. Which doesn’t mean I shouldn’t be honest, but I should be more considerate and conscious of the fact that my words have an affect.

So, I’ve gone back and altered the blog post in question- deleted a few lines that, I agree, were a bit out of line and possibly pointed a finger at him in ways he might not appreciate. I looked over a few others to be sure that I had eliminated any information that might point a finger at any young person in particular.  I even changed a few things I said that I felt could be hurtful in some way.

And I offer here a public apology for any undue stress or upset I might have caused through my “unconscious” writing to this young man or to anyone else for that matter! All I really want to do is help and inform, and I didn’t do a good job of that with that post — or a few others. (I admit I was in a hurry and not really thinking through what I was writing. I’ll  try not to let it happen again!)

That said, I would hasten to bet that Julian is more than a bit appalled a lot of the time about what I write about him here. I reveal way more than he would like, I”m sure, in a very public manner. So, if anyone should be upset, it’s probably him! (I’m actually quite concerned about the repercussions this will have on him…)

As for the second issue this young man raised, I’ll address it, although I did bring it up already once: doing choreography “exactly as taught” or “making it your own.” Maybe it’s appropriate to put this subject up for discussion once more, especially as Julian gets ready to go to The Pulse and as other boys (and girls) are frequenting the spring convention circuit. Plus, it’s always important as our boys audition for anything at all, convention scholarships or parts in productions.

My understanding is that there is an appropriate time to make choreography “your own.”  If you are doing choreography as a group as, lets say, back up for a performing artist, you would all want to do the choreography in the same manner so the group has a uniform affect. This seems to be true for large hip hop groups, like the one I just profiled for Dance Spiritmagazine, Xtreme Dance Force in Naperville, IL.

However, in other pieces where there is room for a bit of individuality – that doesn’t take away from the overall picture (meaning one person’s interpretation of the choreography doesn’t draw your eye away from the other dancers in the ensemble making the piece not feel uniform) – it’s okay to take the choreography and “make it your own.” By this I mean, to make it fit your body and your movements and maybe to even interpret it a bit. I can see this in many modern pieces and tap pieces. For example, I see this at Teen Dance Company when the kids are given lots of different movements to do, each person’s part in the overall peice being fairly unique and different. I also see this in the pieces done by The North Carolina Tap Ensemble, which I also profiled for Dance Spirit, where each tapper does have a bit of a unique style of their own, but it doesn’t take away from the piece as a whole.

I have been told, however, that a dancer doesn’t want his or her moves to be too different from those of the other dancers doing identical, or even similar, choreography; his moves shouldn’t be a lot larger or smaller and they shouldn’t take her too far away or too close to the other dancers. It’s much easier for a dancer to make the moves his or her own when each dancer in a piece has been given a piece of choreography that is a bit different from everyone else’s. When everyone is being asked to do the same exact choreography, that is when it should be done in exactly the same fashion. That’s my understanding at least.

As I mentioned in a previous post, the kids at Teen Dance Company were specifically instructed prior to Nuvo convention notto make the choreography at conventions “their own” but to copy it exactly — meaning crisply, concisely, as taught, without any alterations or creative interpretation on their part. It seemed that students making the choreography their own – not dancing it exactly as taught but interpreting it and being creative with it – were the ones noticed at that particular convention. So, which is the correct tack to take in the convention situation? And which is the correct tack to take in other situations? Any experts care to comment?

We thought Julian had his summer all planned out: Back to Jewish camp for four weeks, something he had his heart set on, especially after missing almost half of his session last year when he came down with what was later diagnosed as Relapsing Fever. This was to be his last summer not spent focusing on dance. He’d keep taking dance classes after that at Teen Dance Company and participate in their summer intensive.

Right.

But we, his parents, couldn’t leave well enough alone. We kept thinking, “He should be dancing,” and we decided he should at least audition for some summer programs so he could (1) see what the auditions were like, and (2) see how he fared against the other dancers — in particular the boys. So, we planned on taking him to two auditions, one for Alonzo King’s Lines Ballet, a contemporary company with which he’d really like to get involved, and American Ballet Theatre, which offers programs in several places around the country, including Irving, CA (where we thought he might get in even though it was for “advanced” students) and New York City (their premier program that includes classes specifically for boys).

Well, we couldn’t get to the Lines audition, because Julian had rehearsals that day for his upcoming Second Stage show at Teen Dance Company. We had to reschedule for next month. We did make it to the ABT audition, though, along with four other boys and about 86 girls. A week later, we got an email: Julian had been accepted into the NYC program and awarded a 25% merit scholarship. We couldn’t believe it. We didn’t know if he’d even get into Irvine, but he’d also put NYC down as his first choice on the application. Ultimately, ABT makes the decision about where you are placed, however.

Now our world has turned upside down. To go to camp or to NYC, that is the question.

In a very mature fashion — and with fellow ballet dancers telling him they’ll “kill him if he doesn’t go,” Julian says he thinks he will pass on camp and take advantage of this opportunity. Camp is just a fleeting four weeks never to be repeated again. ABT summer intensive will make him a better dancer for life. But…we have to figure out if we can afford it (Even with the scholarship it is expensive, and we have to add in airline tickets, housing — not provided, food, etc.), where we will stay, how he will be chaperoned, if my daughter can do without me for six weeks (since I’ll be chaperoning), if my daughter can get her driver’s license by then (since she will need to get to her summer internship every day), and, oh, so many more logistics. Not to mention that my husband could be without a job at that point…

Well, it’s all very exciting and nerve wracking. And we are so surprised, and Julian feels very fortunate. His ballet teacher, Mark Foehringer, says that this is exactly what he needs, because it is a formal program (which does seem to have classes in a variety of dance styles, by the way, including yoga and how to prevent injury) and offers him a chance to be in a boys’ class with at least 35 other excellent male dancers. This will push him, I’m sure, to be better. Boys thrive on being with other boys and competing with them. Julian has never been in a class with more than three other boys at a time, I don’t think.

You might wonder why he has chosen a ballet program, when he has said he doesn’t want to be a ballet dancer. He knows that ballet remains the foundation of all the types of dance he wants to do, and contemporary is high on his list. Plus, he says that if he can’t get a job in another style of dance, he’d like to be able to apply for a job in a ballet company. Not a bad strategy, I don’t think. I’m not sure if it’s possible to take that route, but I guess we’ll find out.

All that said, poor Julian is again faced with another choice to make. We keep telling him choices are a good thing, but to him it’s always about giving up one thing he wants for another thing he wants, which means missing out on something. In this case, giving up camp means giving up being with the group of friends that has always accepted him. He’s always felt comfortable with them and like he could be himself — even though he was a dancer. He’s never had that anywhere else. He has it with a few friends now in high school, but camp was always his safe haven from the turmoil of social life at school.

However, as a mother I can say that when I see him with other dancers, such as at the ABT audition, that’s when he’s really in his element and most comfortable. That’s when he’s “Julian” through and through.  Not surprising really.

We have to decide soon what he will do. I”ll keep you posted. And take my advice, leave well enough alone unless you are willing to deal with the ramifications!

Check here for my next blog post on Julian’s adventures wearing bootie shorts — his worst nightmare becomes a reality!